If I See an Elephant Fly...

remember the movie Dumbo?
when i was a little kid,
i would make my dad rent me this movie
almost every weekend.
he finally bought me a copy & i watched it everyday.
literally, EVERY. DAY. (ask my mom, she'll back me up)

anyhow, for those of you
who have never seen this film,
here is a quick summary...
baby elephant is a social outcast
because of his large ears/silly hat.
elephants' mom goes to "circus jail".
meets a mouse-bro & some stereotypically racist crows
learns to fly.
gets his own private train car.
hazzah.

oh yeah, i forgot...
in one scene, Dumbo & Mouse-Bro get's drunk
& basically freaks the fuck out.
this is without a doubt the trippiest thing
i've ever seen in a Disney movie.

...some animator was eating acid sandwiches for lunch

so enjoy some crazy tripped out nonsense...
in the last place you would ever expect it...
a kid's movie about... flying... baby... elephants?

forget it, this movie's fucking trippy.
end of story.

Hail, Hail

Pearl Jam is one of my favorite bands of all time.
(seriously, i heart Pearl Jam)

that being said, i hate most other bands
that Pearl Jam have directly inspired.
so, basically i have to repeat
this conversation all the time...
green = the baron
yellow = typical shit-rock bro

Bro, you like Pearl Jam?
Um, Yes?
Do you like Staind?
...No.
Oh, Well do you like Coldplay?
Not really, i like that song from the iPod commercial, though.
Oh, You should get a Zune.
Whatever.


Do you like the Fray?
Go fuck yourself.

(aaaaaaand scene.)
just to set the record straight
here is a list of bands that were (probably)
inspired by Pearl Jam that i can't stand...
- Griffin House (Porterhouse?)
- Papa Bro-ach
- Alter Bro-dge
- the Nickelbros
- 3 Bros Down
- Theroy of a Deadbro
- Breaking Bro-jamin

regardless, Pearl Jam represented a different time in my musical life.
sandwiched between the Paul McCartney era & the Ben Folds period,
Pearl Jam was the band that first made me care about the image of the
members of the band & not just the the sound of the music.
it was never Eddie Vedder's band,
it was the band that Eddie played
in with his best friends.

it wasn't about selling records
(even though they were the biggest rock band in America for almost a decade)
it was about the band making music they loved
& if you liked it, then you liked it.
if not, they didn't give a shit.

to be honest, i didn't get to really enjoy Pearl Jam
the way they were meant to be seen.
in the Pacific Northwest in the early 90's.
back when Vedder was a little slimmer & trimmer.
back when he was jumping off scaffolding
& throwing microphone stands into the crowd.
back before alt-rock was destroyed
by the death of analog recording.
(digital recording is fine, but it doesn't have the same heart)
back before Lifehouse was a real band.


I've only seen Pearl Jam once.
May 12th, 2005 @ the Pepsi Arena in Albany, NY
(setlist)
My Morning Jacket opened up before they got huge
but to be honest, i don't remember much of their set
besides a good live version of " Off the Record".
Eddie drank a whole bottle of wine & smoked
an full pack of American Spirits during the almost 3 hour set.
(smoking an American Spirit is like smoking a handgun)
needless to say, PJ brought the heat.
they played the song "Rats" for the first time in 8 years
and it fuckin' killed.
the whole place blew up.

i don't listen to Pearl Jam all the time anymore.
as a matter-of-fact,
i can only listen to them about 5/6 months
out of the year...

basically all the cold-ish Upstate NY months

but when i get in the mood, in the right state of mind,
i still get sucked in.
Vedder's voice is the most copied (abused?)
voice in all of music, but it still sends
chills down my spine sometimes
& McCready/Gossard are a 2-headed Classic Rock Riff Monster.

Oh, Yeah....

i almost forgot about Jeff Ament.

seriously, this dude is an accidental fashion icon.
most indie-bro i have ever seen.
i mean come on!
...look at that hat.

that is a fuckin hat, that's for damn sure.
(dude is also a revolutionary bass player)

Carpetbaggers

i know.... it's been a while.
i promise i'll get on & post more stuff.

for now, watch this.
it's like my indie-wet dream.

Supreme Demonstraton.

remember when our parents wouldn't let us play this?
when you look at it now, it's more funny than violent.

is this what causes Columbine-Bro's?
does Barack Obama know how to do Scorpion's Fatality? (Up, Up, HP)



...remember when Sub-Zero looked like a very cold Shredder?

i don't either actually...
what the fuck?

Sir Charles Raids Again.

it's boggles my mind how i've never

blogged about this before now.

it's literally everything on the planet i like.

godzilla

nikes

& sir charles.

solid gold.

speaking of which...

Godzilla Kicks!!!!!

(click that.)

Rest is Good for the Blood...

What's Up, Doc?

when i was a kid, i loved Looney Tunes

(as opposed to know where i just love hipster tunes)

and for whatever reason this was my favorite one.

i really enjoy the name of the "Dracula" character too

Count BloodCount

i just think that's really clever

("how's that working out for ya, being clever?" - Tyler Durden)

Warner Bros. was always a little bit edgier than Disney cartoons.

kinda like how the Simpsons wasn't as funny anymore

when Family Guy blew up. (my dad always refers to it as "the Family Man")

i also really dig the creepy vibe

the old-school artwork lends to the cartoon

plus the voice acting is just stellar.

so enjoy some classic animation

just for ya'll, from the Baron.

jaycw.

jaycw 1982-2008

i can't think of a more fitting photo.

one year ago, Jason Christopher Wilhelm passed away.

he was twenty-five years old & he died from cancer.

Jay was more than just a drummer, he was my friend.

one of my best friends as a matter-of-fact.

sometimes, i feel like we were all robbed.

i know he was sick, but twenty-five is so young.

when i think about all the things that he's missed

& all the things i wish he were still here for,

it makes me mad that his time was up so quickly.

i don't believe in destiny, but i do believe that

we have a pre-determined amount of time on this earth

& the key is to make those most out of the time we have.

because we never know when our time is up.

new york city, 2006

Jay was one of those special types of people.

those people who we sometimes don't appreciate at first.

maybe it was because Jay never pulled any punches.

maybe it's because he stood behind his decisions, 

even when he was the only one who believed in it . 

maybe it's because we're all just a little bit too stubborn sometimes.

whatever the reason, it wasn't very long before we became like brothers.

when you spend days/weeks living in a van with someone,

driving from Minnesota to Cleveland to New York more times than i can remember now

you realize quickly that these are the people who feel the way you do.

Jay was such a driving force behind the Blueprint

that it will never ever feel the same way with anyone else.

i don't know what happens when our time is up on this planet

if you've read any of my other blogs, 

you'll know i'm not a very religious person.

but it's very comforting to me personally that when i die,

i'll be able to see him again wherever i end up.

i hope there's more to it then just rotting in the ground.

at least spiritually.

either way, i have faith that i will see my friend again someday.

& when we do meet again, we can enjoy ridiculing people from heaven.

the OtherSide, 2007

get it?

DinoBros: the Series

Episode II: Ooohh, Steve (click that)

Episode III: Ooooooooo, Dave (click that)

Episode IV: A Letter Home (click that)

Episode V: Erwin Spidermin (click that) (new)

Baron Von BlackSheep.

anytime, i get together with my family i feel like a failure.

and that's not a knock on them

i love them. & not just cause i have to.

(ok, sometimes only because i have to, as we start to get away from the blood relatives.)

let me put it this way...

i have two older sisters.

and they are both...

a.) married.

b.) mothers to beautiful children.

c.) have degrees from College they no longer use/need/care about.

d.) more fashionable that me.

e.) held in higher regard than me in the eyes of my family.

f.) all of the above.

i guess i've sorta become this odd running joke for the members of my family.

the smart-aleck brother who smokes to much weed.

the lazy cousin who left school to join a band.

the foul-mouthed son who only calls when he needs money.

the tallest member of a family of midgets. (that's only on the italian side though)

so am i surprised when no one shows any faith in me?

no necessarily, most of those accusations have merit.

that's not really the issue...

i know i'm not the only pothead in my family.

i know cause some of them taught ME how to do it.

and i guarantee i'm not the laziest one in the family. 

(you should see us on thanksgiving)

it's a blindly-judgmental hypocrisy to make me the target of my families collective ridicule, especially when most of the skeletons in my closet would run & hide if they knew what may be lurking behind the closed doors in some of my families homes.

maybe that's the key to family though.

the only people who really give it to us straight.

the people who aren't afraid to call us out on the carpet for our failings under the guise of love & support.

and no matter what we do, we can never really escape.

no matter where we go, it's never far enough.

no matter how far away we run, sometimes, we just have to come back.

because we love them for who they are.

because we hate them for what they make us see in ourselves

because we spend our lives outrunning there shadows

even as the shadows grow longer at sunset.

they are the only people we can't hide from.

"i can't hide chu' here!"

Control Yourself.

can't wait for blink & weezer.

up in the air about the fall out boys.